This week is brought to you by the word struggle bus

Sometime between Monday and Tuesday, I boarded the struggle bus and I haven't gotten off. What's worse, I willing waved my arms, flagged it down, and got on!

I'm still trying to find this balance of having fun, and responsibility. With quotes like,"You have four years to be irresponsible here. Relax. Work is for people with jobs. You'll never remember class time, but you'll remember time you wasted hanging out with your friends. So, stay out late. Go out on a Tuesday with your friends when you have a paper due Wednesday. Spend money you don't have. Drink 'til sunrise. The work never ends, but college does..." (Tom Petty) floating around, I can't really be blamed that I went out dancing instead of learning how to conjugate "mettre" for my French class on Friday right? Not to mention that I felt super cool flashing my 21-year-old ID and got to skip those hideous black X's on my hands.

And at work on Wednesday, another 8th grader made me realize how different life is at 14 and 21. She was telling me how lucky I am that I can stay up as late as I want, have people whenever I want, eat whatever I want, and basically do whatever I want. Which is kind of true. We have a lot of freedom at this age, and I've been wondering if I've been taking advantage of it since I like to keep my life organized, scheduled, and planned out. Maybe that's why I ate a whole pan of brownies with friends instead of reading a 27 paged article for class. Maybe that's why I had to eat a Hershey's chocolate kiss for breakfast on Wednesday. (Which isn't as glamorous as our first grade selves thought it would be to have candy for breakfast.) As fun as these past couple of nights have been, I have definitely felt the consequences in my classes. Forgetting assignments, not doing well on quizzes, only hitting a triple pirouette once, and just the general feeling that I will pass out from exhaustion at any moment.

I wish that when it came to partying and procrastinating I could say that

But when I felt super sick Friday night, I finally found my stop and got off the struggle bus because I made myself skip a party just so I could get sleep and feel better. 

I'm sure it's possible to balance having fun and and being responsible. But maybe it's okay that we're not really sure how to equalize them right now. And maybe it's better to have a few slip-ups now than later when we have jobs. After all, work never ends, but college does.